Futile Fantasy Trilogy
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SIR FLAXLEY OF
TIFAERIS AS A TEENAGER IN TIFAERIS, FLAXLEY HAD BEEN TRAINED BY HIS FATHER TO WORK WITH HIM IN THE TIMBER TRADE. AS PART OF THIS TRAINING HE'D DELIVER THE TIMBER TO NEARBY VILLAGES. WHEN RETURNING ONE MORNING FROM AN OVERNIGHT TRIP HE FOUND TIFAERIS RAISED TO THE GROUND AND DESTROYED. HIS PARENTS SLAIN. UPON DISCOVERING THE NEIGHBOURING TREPE TRIBE WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE SLAUGHTER, FLAXLEY SET OUT TO LEARN THE KNIGHT'S CODES AND MASTER SWORDSMANSHIP, IN THE HOPE THAT HE MAY ONE DAY RETURN TO AVENGE HIS PARENTS DEATHS AND THE OBLITERATION OF HIS TOWN. AFTER THREE YEARS OF PURE DEDICATION TO HONING HIS FIGHTING SKILLS, FLAXLEY GOES TO THE NORTHERN CITY OF GUEVINA AND JOINS THE ARMY. HIS POTENTIAL IS SOON RECOGNISED BY THE KING AND HE'S PROMOTED TO ROYAL KNIGHT. OVER THE YEARS FLAXLEY'S SKILLS WITH THE SWORD MAKE HIM SOMETHING OF A LIVING LEGEND AND A BABE MAGNET. DEDICATED TO THE KNIGHTS CODE, HE EVENTUALLY RIDS HIS MIND OF VENGEANCE AND LIVES TO SERVE THE KING OF GUEVINA AND HIS SPOILT DAUGHTER. AT PEACE WITH THE WORLD, FLAXLEY BECOMES SETTLED IN GUEVINA UNTIL THE DAY HE MEETS HIS NEW APPRENTICE AND EMBARKS ON A MISSION THAT WILL CHANGE HIS LIFE FOREVER. STRENGTHS: SWORD SKILLS, PHYSICAL MIGHT, TACTICS. WEAKNESSES: ARROGANCE, BAD PUNNING AND REMEMBERING NAMES.
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LEFIAT RAISED BY HIS MOTHER IN ONE OF THE LESSER DESIRABLE VILLAGES IN THE CITY OF GUEVINA, TEENAGER, LEFIAT HAS ALWAYS DREAMT OF BEING A KNIGHT. UNFORTUNATELY, BEING BUILT LIKE A STICK, ACCIDENT PRONE, UNCHARISMATIC AND CONSUMMATELY STUPID, HE DOESN'T STAND MUCH OF A CHANCE OF EVER ACHIEVING THIS GOAL. HIS MOTHER, KNOWN TO LOCALS AS MADAME LEATHERCLAD, TAKES PITY ON HIS HOPELESSNESS AND TOLERATES HIM, KNOWING HE'S FAR FROM LIKELY EVER TO MOVE OUT OF THE FAMILY HOME. HIS AMBITIONS ARE HEIGHTENED BY THE STEADY STREAM OF SOLDIERS WHO VISIT HIS MOTHER ON A REGULAR BASIS. THINKING THEY'RE THERE FOR DANCING LESSONS, HE ADMIRES THEIR WEAPONRY AND WISHES ONE DAY HE COULD BE AMONG THEIR NUMBER. SADLY, HE HAS TO MAKE DO WITH THE WOODEN SWORD HE MADE FROM SPOONS AND ROLE PLAYING WITH HIS FRIEND, ALL THE WHILE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR THE LOCAL BULLY. LIKE ALL THE CITIZENS OF GUEVINA, HE'S A STAUNCH ROYALIST AND WHEN HEARING ABOUT THE KING'S VISIT TO HIS VILLAGE, PROMPTLY FORGETS. LUCKILY, HIS ONE AND ONLY FRIEND REMINDS HIM AND THEY GO OFF TO SEE THE KING. DURING THE VISIT, THE CLUMSY LEFIAT ACCIDENTALLY FALLS ON THE KING. AN ACCIDENT WHICH LEADS TO HIM EMBARKING ON A FANTASTIC JOURNEY THAT CHANGES HIS LIFE BEYOND ALL RECOGNITION. STRENGTHS: HE MEANS WELL. WEAKNESSES: EVERYTHING ELSE.
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PRINCESS MANDIKA OF
GUEVINA THE TEENAGE DAUGHTER OF KING FALBURY, PRINCESS MANDIKA IS A STEREOTYPICAL ONLY CHILD. SHE MAKES NO SECRET OF HER DISTAIN FOR PEASANTS AND SERVANTS. SHE GENUINELY THINKS OF HERSELF AS THE ONLY PERSON IN THE UNIVERSE WHO MATTERS. WITHOUT HER LATE MOTHER TO GUIDE HER, HER FATHER HAS ALWAYS INDULGED HER EVERY WHIM, ALLOWING HER TO BELIEVE HER OWN DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR. THE PRINCESS' TWO MAIN LOVES IN LIFE ARE HER HAIR AND GOING ON TRIPS OUTSIDE THE CITY. SHE LOVES TO LOOK DOWN ON PEASANTS FROM OTHER PARTS OF THE WORLD, PLUS THEY GIVE HER THE OPPORTUNITY TO PURSUE HER UNREQUITED LOVE FOR HER GUARDIAN, ROYAL KNIGHT, SIR FLAXLEY. FLAXLEY'S GRACE, POISE, MANLINESS AND CHARM MAKE HIM QUITE THE CATCH AND SHE GENUINELY BELIEVES NO OTHER WOMAN IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM. CONVINCED SHE'LL MANAGE TO SEDUCE HIM ONE DAY, SHE SETS OUT ON A TRIP THAT THREATENS TO BE HER LAST. NORMALLY I WRITE HERE HOW IT CHANGED HER FOREVER, ALAS IT DIDN'T. A FEW THINGS IN HER LIFE MAY CHANGE, SHE UNFORTUNATELY, NEVER WILL. STRENGTHS: HAS A LOT OF MONEY WEAKNESSES: SELF OBSESSION, LAZINESS AND IGNORANCE.
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BONSON BUTLER TO THE ROYAL HOUSEHOLD OF GUEVINA, BONSON, HATES HIS LIFE. HE HATES HIS DUTY AND HE HATES THE ROYAL FAMILY. RESENTING EVERY CHORE HE'S GIVEN, HE SERVES WITH A PATRONISING UNDERTONE. SAFE IN THE KNOWLEDGE THAT ROYALS ARE TOO SELF ABSORBED TO KNOW HE'S MAKING FUN OF THEM, HE USES SARCASM AND CUTTING WIT TO MAKE IT THROUGH EVERY LONG DAY. HIS ONLY RELEASES ARE SIR FLAXLEY, THE ONLY PERSON IN THE ROYAL ABODE HE CAN STAND AND HIS LONG STANDING LOVE FOR ALE. DESPITE HIS HATRED OF EVERYTHING, FINDING A JOB HE'D BE HAPPIER IN IS NOT AN OPTION. HE'S BECOME ACCUSTOMED TO FEELING MISERABLE AND ENJOYS COMPLAINING. SET IN HIS WAYS, BONSON IS A CALLOUS AND UNPLEASANT MAN. INITIALLY HE HIDES HIS ANGER AT MANKIND BEHIND THE PATRONISATION OF HIS PEERS AND HIS ABUSE OF THE WORDS "SIR" AND "MA'AM". FOLLOWING A DISASTROUS EVENT ON A TRIP WITH THE PRINCESS, HOWEVER, HE SNAPS AND SHOWS HIS TRUE COLOURS. FREE TO ABUSE WHO HE FEELS LIKE, HE SUDDENLY BEGINS TO ENJOY LIFE A LOT MORE. STRENGTHS: WISDOM AND INTELLIGENCE. WEAKNESSES: ANGER, GENERAL DISTAIN AND HIS DETERMINATION TO BELITTLE EVERYBODY.
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KRITZEVELTIA SKIZMOTZO BALLEVENTIOS
(KRITZ) AS A CHILD HER HOME TOWN OF TIFAERIS IS DEVASTATED IN A VICIOUS ATTACK BY THE NEIGHBOURING TREPE TRIBE. HER PARENTS SLAIN, SHE IS SPARED THE SWORD AND TAKEN BACK TO THE TREPE VILLAGE TO BE RAISED AS ONE OF THEIR OWN. AFTER A FEW YEARS OF LIVING AMONGST THE PSYCHOTIC, ALL FEMALE TRIBE, KRITZ FORGETS ALL ABOUT HER PAST IN TIFAERIS AND TRAINS TO BE A WARRIOR. SHE SOON DEVELOPS ALL THE WELL KNOWN TREPE TRAITS SUCH AS HATRED FOR MEN AND RAGE. AT THE AGE OF 21, SHE IS SENT FROM THE TRIBAL VILLAGE TO SURVIVE ON HER OWN FOR 12 MONTHS, THE FINAL TEST FOR A TREPE WARRIOR. ONLY A FEW MONTHS INTO HER TRIAL SHE CROSSES PATHS WITH SIR FLAXLEY OF TIFAERIS AND HER WORLD IS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN. STRENGTHS: AGILITY, HAND TO HAND COMBAT, EXPERT THIEF AND CASINO CHEAT. WEAKNESSES: A SHORT FUSE AND A VIOLENT TEMPER.
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DEREK THE THREE FOOT TALL GREEN ALIEN FROM THE PLANET TRYME 17 CAME TO EARTH BY ACCIDENT. HAVING FAILED AT TECHNOLOGY COLLEGE ON HIS HOME PLANET, HE JOINED THE AIR FORCE AND CRASHED WHILE ON A ROUTINE INSPECTION OF THE PLANET SURFACE. LUCKILY FOR LERAMITE MALE, DEREK, HE CRASHED OFF THE COAST OF GUEVINA AND WAS FOUND BY FLAXLEY ON A PATROL OF THE AREA. FLAXLEY NURSED THE LITTLE GREEN MAN BACK TO HEALTH AND THEY BECAME FRIENDS. DECIDING IT MIGHT BE DANGEROUS IF HE STAYED IN GUEVINA, DEREK LEFT THE CITY TO TRY TO REPAIR WHAT REMAINED OF HIS CRAFT AND GET BACK TO HIS HOME PLANET. HIDING OUT IN THE SAFETY OF BARON LAND, DEREK MANAGED TO GET HIS CRAFT STARTED AND YET UNABLE TO FLY. IT WAS AT THIS POINT HIS PATH CROSSED WITH FLAXLEY'S ONCE MORE AND HE LEAPT AT THE CHANCE TO HELP HIS OLD FRIEND AND REPAY THE FAVOUR. A FAVOUR HE MAY LIVE TO REGRET. STRENGTHS: A DEADLY PHYSICAL ASSAULT, MIND READING, CLIMBING AND A MASTERY OF MAGIC. WEAKNESSES: MIND READING MAY BE USEFUL BUT IT ANNOYS HIS PEERS IMMENSELY. IRRESISTIBLE TO DOGS. |