WELCOME
TO
WELCOME
TO
FUTILE'S NIGHTCLUB
(THE BEST FAKE NIGHTCLUB ON THE NET)
IN 1997 LORD TRIMMINGLY OF HERTFORD AND SIR ROBERT FORTESQUE-SMYTHE MP, BOTH LONG STANDING PILLARS OF THE ENGLISH MAFIA (CONSERVATIVE PARTY), WERE SENT TO JAIL FOR A CRIME THEY DIDN'T ADMIT. THESE TWO MEN PROMPTLY ESCAPED JUSTICE TO THE CARIBBEAN WHERE THEY SURVIVE ON THEIR ILL-GOTTEN GAINS FROM YEARS OF CASH FOR QUESTIONS, VOTE RIGGING AND GERRYMANDERING. TODAY, IF YOU NEED A RAUNCHY NIGHT OUT AND NOBODY ELSE CAN HELP, IF YOU CAN FIND THEM, MAYBE YOU CAN HIRE A LIMO AND GO TO THEIR NIGHTCLUB.
-COME JOIN US AT THE HOTTEST CLUB IN PARADISE-