FUTILE'S - THE BEST FAKE NIGHTCLUB ON THE INTERNET.
EVENTS GALLERY 1 - FANCY DRESS PARTY
HERE ARE THE HIGHLIGHTS OF A RECENT FANCY DRESS PARTY AT FUTILE'S.
| THIS IS MELANIE, SIR ROBERT FORTESQUE-SMYTHE'S FORMER
SECRETARY AND IN SEVERAL FRAUD CASES, HIS CO-ACCUSED. SHE'S ALWAYS
BEEN KNOWN FOR HAVING A WORLD CLASS BACKSIDE AND HERE'S WHY. HER COSTUME WAS BOUGHT FOR HER BY FORTESQUE-SMYTHE AND RUMOUR HAS IT SHE USED TO WEAR IT AROUND THE OFFICE OCCASIONALLY. THIS WOULD EXPLAIN THE BIZARRE NUMBER OF PAY RISES SHE USED TO GET. SHE DIDN'T WIN THE COMPETITION BUT SHE DID WIN THE COVETED "PEACHY BACKSIDE" AWARD FOR A THIRD TIME IN A ROW. |
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| MAKING AN EFFORT IS ALWAYS APPRECIATED AT FUTILE'S
AND AS A RESULT, KELLY FROM SWINDON RECEIVED A GLOWING RECEPTION FROM
THE JUDGES. THE IRONY OF HER COSTUME WASN'T LOST ON THE JUDGES EITHER. AS MANY OF THEM KNOW FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THIS GIRL IS NO ANGEL. ALTHOUGH SHE WAS DISAPPOINTED SHE DIDN'T WIN, KELLY HAS VOWED TO RETURN NEXT TIME AND MAKE THE TROPHY HER OWN. |
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| THIS YOUNG LADY'S POLICE COSTUME WOULD NORMALLY HAVE
BEEN WELL RECEIVED IN A CONTEST LIKE THIS. UNFORTUNATELY FOR
SANDRA FROM BRISTOL, HOWEVER, THE POLICE ARE A SORE SUBJECT FOR THE TWO
CO-OWNERS AT THIS TIME. HAVING SPENT ALL EVENING APOLOGISING FOR HER CHOICE OF COSTUME, SANDRA FINALLY MADE AMENDS WHEN SHE AGREED TO TAKE PART IN THE NEXT AMATEUR STRIP NIGHT. WE ALL LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING HER PERFORMANCE. |
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| AMBER FROM WATFORD SPENT THREE WEEKS MAKING THIS
PIRATE COSTUME, A SEXY LITTLE NUMBER THAT WENT DOWN VERY WELL WITH THE
JUDGES. FOR A WHILE SHE LOOKED LIKE SHE MIGHT BE IN WITH A CHANCE
OF WINNING UNTIL SHE MADE THE FOOLISH MISTAKE OF ADMITTING SHE VOTED
LIBERAL DEMOCRAT IN THE LAST GENERAL ELECTION. SEEING AS SHE HADN'T VOTED LABOUR SHE WAS ALLOWED TO STAY IN THE CLUB BUT HER CHANCES OF WINNING WITHERED AND DIED.
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| "IF YOU'RE GOING TO CHEAT, YOU COULD AT LEAST MAKE AN
EFFORT." THOSE WERE THE WORDS OF LORD TRIMINGLY WHEN THE STRIPPER
KEIKO MADE HER WAY ONTO THE STAGE AND SIMPLY POSED IN ONE OF HER
NUMEROUS STRIPTEASE OUTFITS. ALTHOUGH SHE LOOKED WONDERFUL IN HER WAITRESS COSTUME, THE JUDGES WERE FAR FROM IMPRESSED. AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE WASN'T THE ONLY DANCING GIRL TO JOIN IN THE FUN. |
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| AND HERE SHE IS, THE CURRENT HOLDER OF THE "WORST
COSTUME EVER" AWARD.
MEET CAROLINE FROM SURREY. HAVING SPENT ALL DAY ON THE BEACH AND FALLEN ASLEEP IN THE SUN, SHE HAD CHRONIC SUN BURN ON HER BACK AND THE BACK OF HER LEGS. AS A RESULT, THE REST OF HER COSTUME WAS TOO PAINFUL TO WEAR. NOT BEING THE SMARTEST GIRL IN THE WORLD, RATHER THAN NOT TAKE PART, SHE COVERED HER SUNBURN IN CASUAL CLOTHES AND ENTERED THE CONTEST WEARING ONLY THE HELMET. UNSURPRISINGLY, SHE WAS BOOED OFF STAGE. |
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| JUST AS KEIKO HAD, FUTILE'S VERY OWN STRIPPING
SENSATION, SOPHIE ENTERED THE CONTEST AND TOOK TO THE STAGE WEARING ONE
OF HER STRIPTEASE OUTFITS. UNLIKE KEIKO, HOWEVER, SOPHIE WORKED
THE CROWDS AND VERY NEARLY WON THE CONTEST. AS SHE GIGGLED IN A GIRLY MANNER AND SUBTLY BENT OVER AT ALL THE SEXIEST TIMES, TRIMINGLY AND FORTESQUE-SMYTHE WERE BOTH HEARD TO REMARK THAT SHE WAS AN IMPOSSIBLE ACT TO FOLLOW. AS IT TURNED OUT THEY WERE WRONG. SHE WAS A TOUGH ACT TO FOLLOW, BUT NOT IMPOSSIBLE. |
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| AND THE WINNER IS FUTILE'S VERY OWN, NIKKI.
LAST TIME NIKKI, THE BARMAID, WAS ON THIS STAGE, SHE HAD AN ATTACK OF
NERVES DURING AMATEUR STRIP NIGHT. AS A RESULT SHE STOOD THERE IN
TERROR HAVING TRIED TO HIDE BEHIND THE POLE. IN STARK CONTRAST TO
THAT NIGHT, THIS TIME SHE STRODE CONFIDENTLY ONTO THE STAGE AND WOWED
THE JUDGES WITH HER SEXY GLADIATOR OUTFIT. OF COURSE, THERE WAS A LOT OF ANGER THAT ONCE AGAIN A MEMBER OF STAFF HAD WON THE CASH PRIZE IN A FUTILE'S CONTEST, BUT AS ALWAYS, THE TWO CO-OWNERS COULDN'T HAVE CARED LESS ABOUT THE PROTESTS. AS FAR AS THEY WERE CONCERNED, AND WE THINK YOU'LL AGREE, NIKKI WAS A WORTHY WINNER. |
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